Raw as a Photograph
I had something to get off my chest (kind of? It’s more of an incessant thought that WILL NOT STOP) and I figured I would post it here, because obviously, no one reads anything on the Internet.
I’m not quite sure how I developed this way, but I lie a shit ton. And they’re not all terrible lies of course, but lies nonetheless. I’ve never been completely and brutally honest with anyone, and for some reason, people have told me that it means I’m nice. That doesn’t really make sense to me. Sure, I understand the fact that people’s feelings are at stake and unless you’re a sick son of a bitch, you don’t actually plan on purposefully upsetting someone (by this, I mean that some people like to get a reaction out of others, but no one typically wants to hurt someone to their very core).
However, I don’t understand how that makes you “nice”. You’re not telling someone the actual thoughts that are flowing through your brain, even though they asked for your honest opinion.
I’ve done this my entire life, telling someone what they want to hear, regardless of whether or not it is true. And it wasn’t until now that I realized how unhappy this has made me. Instead of expressing what I want and/or need, I just skate around my truthful answer and tell someone the answer that they are expecting from me.
Where all of this lying came from, I have no idea. I must have developed it on my own because the rest of my family has no problem expressing anything.
And so, I’ve made the decision to be as raw as a photograph (that hasn’t been photoshopped, mind you). I want to be honest and see things as they actually are, excessive flaws and all. I want to be as honest as I want in my songwriting and not feel guilty. I want to feel my freedom of speech and use it.
I want to be as raw as a photograph.
The wonderful and talented Ashely (Best friends girl, and one of of my bfs) did this badass HDR shot of myself one night on the Scrow Porch.
Thanks, Jakey-poo :)
Betty came by on her way
Said she had a word to say
About things today
And fallen leaves.
Still one of my favorite photos that I’ve ever taken.
Brings nostalgia and I like the tones in it :D
"For a moment your eyes open and you know all the things I ever wanted you to know. I don’t know you and I don’t want to ‘till the moment your eyes open and you know." -Keane
Be the person you were meant to be.